Sadcore

Ride

I was in the winter of my life
and the men I met along the road were my only summer.
At night I fell asleep with visions of myself dancing and laughing and crying with them.
Three years down the line of being on an endless world tour
and my memories of them were the only things that sustained me,
and my only real happy times.
I was a singer, not a very popular one,
who once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet
but upon an unfortunate series of events,
saw those dreams dashed and divided like a million stars
in the night sky that I wished on over and over again
sparkling and broken. But I didn’t really mind because
I knew that it takes getting everything you ever
wanted and then losing it to know what true freedom is.

When the people I used to know found out
what I had been doing, how I had been living
they asked me why
But there’s no use in talking to people who have a home,
they have no idea what it’s like to
seek safety in other people,
for home to be wherever you lie your head.

I was always an unusual girl,
my mother told me I had a chameleon soul.
No moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality.
Just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean.
And if I said that I didn’t plan for it
to turn out this way, I’d be lying
because I was born to be the other woman.
I belonged to no one
who belonged to everyone, who had nothing
who wanted everything with a fire for every experience and an obsession
for freedom that terrified me to the point
that I couldn’t even talk about
and pushed me to a nomadic point of
madness that both dazzled and dizzied me.

I’ve been out on that open road
You can be my full time, daddy
White and gold
Singing blues has been getting old
You can be my full time, baby
Hot or cold

Don’t break me down
I’ve been travelin’ too long
I’ve been trying too hard
With one pretty song

I hear the birds on the summer breeze, I drive fast
I am alone in the night
Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I
I’ve got a war in my mind
So, I just ride
So, I just ride
So, I just ride
So, I just ride

Dying young and I’m playing hard
That’s the way my father made his life an art
Drink all day and we talk ‘til dark
That’s the way the Road Dogs do it, ride ‘til dark

Don’t leave me now
Don’t say goodbye
Don’t turn around
Leave me high and dry

I hear the birds on the summer breeze, I drive fast
I am alone in the night
Been trying hard not to get in trouble, but I
I’ve got a war in my mind
I just ride
I just ride
I just ride
I just ride

I’m tired of feeling like I’m fucking crazy
I’m tired of driving ‘till I see stars in my eyes
I look up to hear myself saying
“Baby, too much I strive, I just ride”

I hear the birds on the summer breeze, I drive fast
I am alone in the night
Been trying hard not to get in trouble, but I
I’ve got a war in my mind
I just ride
I just ride
I just ride
I just ride

Every night I used to pray that I’d find my people
And finally I did — on the open road.
We had nothing to lose, nothing to gain,
nothing we desired anymore
except to make our lives a work of art.

Live fast. Die Young. Be Wild. And Have Fun.

I believe in the country America used to be.
I believe in the person I want to become.
I believe in the freedom of the open road.
And my motto is the same as ever —
I believe in the kindness of strangers.
And when I’m at war with myself — I ride. I just ride.

Who are you? Are you in touch with all of your darkest fantasies?
Have you created a life for yourself where you’re free to experience them?
I have.
I am fucking crazy. But I am free.

Lana Del Rey